It's the least wonderful time of the year...

Once again, political season is upon us. Yippee! We get to watch hundreds of commercials of people constantly slandering their opponents, all I'm left with is the name of the opponent... Who am I supposed to vote for again?

WARNING - Here comes the reant....I can't stand it! These buffoons talk about things of the past, how they did this or that... Hey, douche bags! If you want me to vote for you, tell me what you're GOING to do! And as far as slandering your opponent because they're:

-a criminal
-an adulterer
-someone who takes cash on the side
-someone who always misses votes on the floor
-an idiot

Guess what? YOU'RE ALL IDIOTS!

If you WANT to be a politician, you clearly have something wrong with you. You can say you "want to make a difference" or "want to change the world"... Guess what? YOU'RE AN IDIOT. You can make MORE change and affect the world more positively without being in a political office.

Me thinks you want to be a politician for:

-the money
-the illegal money
-the corporate interest money
-YOU'RE AN IDIOT
-the supposed prestige and power
-or possibly the money

Look... the world, our government and most decision makers are ALL stupid. People are stupid. We don't ever do what's right, we do what's right for US. If we did what's right, we'd already have hunger, cancer, AIDS and pollution eradicated. We'd have the free electricity everywhere int he world through solar collection, wind generation and get this - lightning collection. Geez, just like the guy (Edison) who paved the way for electricity usage said we should do way back before the year 1900!!!

Do you think a politician will EVER allow us to use FREE and endless resources AND give them away for FREE instead of using highly profitable (and horribly polluting) coal or even more highly profitable (and dangerously radioactive) nuclear power? Or even more highly profitable (and highly polluting and war mongering) oil??? Hell no.

Why? Because it's always been that way. Teh answers to all of our problems are SO SIMPLE that they DON'T make sense to our programmed-to-think-a-certain-way feeble little minds... What is that certain way? Don't think.

Don't think for yourself. Don't find something simpler, like collecting your rainwater to water your garden and precious green grass... Use the water from the resevoirs and from the aquafers and wells and suck the ground dry instead!!! Hell take a 500 gallon shower while you're at it, do a couple of half-loads of dishes in your dishwasher. Don't worry about the thousands of people dying around the world because they have no drinkable water, it's not your problem, right?

Don't think for yourself. Don't use a renewable resource like straw to build a house. Burn the straw, pollute the environment and use known cancer-causing and mold retaining fiberglass to insulate your house at twice the cost and a third of the effectiveness. Baled straw has an insulating factor of r50 while fiberglass is around r15. Now let the big, bad wolf know that baled straw doesn't burn. Of course, let the lumber and insulation industry just keep baled straw a big secret or laugh it off...

The answers are right before us, IDIOTS. The answers are so simple and we are so complex we'll never see it. Caveman didn't need TiVo. Egyptians didn't use computers to build the pyramids. Everything you'll ever need is right here already, yet we're looking for answers 'out there'.

Gee, just think if we took all the money we spent on going into space and fought diseases and world hunger with it instead? Where would we be today?

Where would we be if we didn't make HALF of the "blockbuster movies" (they sucked anyway) and instead used the money to support all of these worthy causes that Hollywood always SAYS they supporting? Me think AIDS would be the new smallpox and for God's sake (and every man's), breast cancer would be loooong gone!

Just think if we spent our time designing engines that run on water and have a by-product of water and oxygen instead of paying $3.00 a gallon for gas because of hyperbole and fear mongering... oh yeah, the design for the engine I describe ALREADY HAS BEEN DESIGNED. Hey, politicians WHY are we still using oil, anyway??? IDIOTS.

It "used to be" the American way to innovate and overcome obstacles as a way to provide a simpler, more effective way of life. Now we have less freedom than ever. We're tied to our cellphone, filling our SUV with 40 gallons of 94 octane or contemplating Paris Hilton's next event.

But because we're too lazy and fat to do the work up front to take care of the problems later on... of course eliminating problems before they become problems is not what humans do well. Want an example? Just take a look at Congress.

Happy Halloween (Post Script)

I would have to say, this year's Halloween was the best I've ever had! Yeah, the Suns lost; big whoop it's only game one... now we know they won't be able to go 82-0. It was a GREAT Halloween for many reasons including:

*I won the Pumpkin Pie Eating Contest at work for the second year in a row!
*I got to scare the piss out of a bunch of kids (not mine)'
*My kids got to go trick-or-treating and had a ball

My 3 year old daughter dressed as a Princess AND played the role perfectly. Acting like the little princess she is... polite, courteous and absolutely thrilled to see other kids dressed up and having fun. The little girl is funny because she is completely not afraid of anything Halloweeny... She told me as the day was turning to dusk that "there would be many ghosts out tonight" and that she "is not afraid of ghosts or witches". She was watching the other kids in the neighborhood go out and she was exclaiming what they were all dressed as - "Look a Witch, Mommy! Oooh, dat one's a Pumpkin! Look, Daddy! Another Witch!!!"

My 14 month-old son earlier in the day FINALLY got his brain to click regarding this whole standing-walking perambulatory concept we all take for granted. He now "gets it" when ti comes to walking, so he'll berunnng before too long! He dressed up as a Super-baby with cape and all!

As my wife and a friend took the kids out trick or treating, I stayed at home to trick the treaters with help of my buddy John, who dressed as a Hick Farmer. He would answer the door in creepy manners and jump out at the youngsters while I peered through a window and using a microphone, some voice effects, some scary music/noise samples, a candy-laced hyper buzz and a 300 watt amplifier to scare the piss out of them!

Many kids were scared before they even got halfway up the drive! The music, noise and me bellowing "Mwuh-ha-ha!" really freeked them out! One kid inparticular was frightened so much he came up to the door by being pushed by his Mom. He was dressed as Superman so I bellowed "You're a Superhero! Don't be afraid! Superheroes LOVE candy!" and that freeked him even more! It was hilarious seeing the kids enjoy the thrill of Halloween!

There was also one little girl (I think she was a bumblebee) who came up to the door and once John opened it real fast and the wave of noise hit her, she just froze! She was solid stiff and wouldn't move! So I made some more scary noises with the effects and she stayed right there but as she opened her sack to recieve the candy, she began shaking!!! So John gave her two pieces of candy...

Meanwhile, droves of kids came to our house as my kids were out trick and/or treating. We were out of our pile of candy in 38 minutes!!! The gang of our personal candy grubbers came back just as we were hanging a "No Candy Left" sign...

But what made it so much fun was seeing the joy on my kids' faces. My son just shoved candy into his mouth (he is a serious chocoholic- he starts crying for more candy as the piece he has hits his palate!) My daughter explained over and over how she would knock on the door, say "trick or treat" they would give her candy and she would say "thank you". Maybe it was just a sheer sugar rush, but she is exuberant towards life and living and she is just so precious!
(Yeah... I could have scared her!!!)

I suppose I was just enjoying the moment due to my acute pumpkin pie overdose?!?!! I am the Two-Time Champion!!!